And By This I Mean Excuses for Not Writing

Today I awakened with one thing on my to do list: write. But then I remember I have a dentist appointment this morning. Which calls for real clothes and a comb through my hair, and at least enough make up not to frighten small children. Tick-tock.

Well then, as soon as I’m finished at the dentist, I’ll have the rest of the day.

Dental appointment ends with news that my mom has lost her cell phone (she’s on my family plan). This presents two problems. First and most obvious, my writing is going to be delayed. The second stems from the fact that her 87th birthday is right around the corner and she has macular degeneration (still able to see pretty well though). But a new phone is going to be an issue, relearning and all that. So my sister has an old phone (we need basic with a capital B) that we can use. Then pick up my laptop at home and drive to my mother’s house (only 2 miles away, thank goodness). Once I get the phone activated on-line, I can go home and write. Still half a day left!

The webpage of my wireless service is “unavailable.” I visit with Mom and Sister, then try again. No go. I decide to take the phone with me, activate it later, and return it to Mom after I have several brilliant pages turned out. Pack up phone and computer and head out the door. Still nearly half a day of writing time.

Then my son calls to see if I want to meet for lunch. Well, I am kinda hungry. And I have to eat anyway. Plus things are pretty slim in the pantry at home. Good idea. I’ll be home by 1:30—which is about the time my creativity really kicks in anyway.

The lunch place is just down the way from the Verizon store. Might as well pop in and have Mom’s phone changed over. Son is due for an upgrade, so he goes too. Battery in Mom’s replacement phone is dead, but voila! they had an accessory battery. Son makes decisions. Leave the Verizon store before 2. Not bad.

Get in the car and point it toward my home office. Well, Meijer is on my way home. Might as well get a few things for that empty pantry. Shouldn’t take but a few minutes, save me getting out tomorrow.

I gather up my half-cartful and head to the checkout … along with every other person in my town. I’m a real control freak do-it-yourselfer, so naturally I like to U-Scan, which has shorter lines anyway. Get in line behind a couple; brilliant because one is scanning and the other is bagging, twice as fast. I’ll be home writing in no time.

I’m a patient person in checkout lines when there are tabloids and magazines to read. Make it through all of them and the couple is still scanning, apparently the scanner half of the couple isn’t a natural do-it-yourselfer and was having issues. Then the scanner got sassy. Tick-tock.

My turn! I scan and bag and pay. I even remember to stop by the freezer on my way out and pick up the ice I’d paid for — not always the case (mine, unfortunately, did not have a penguin on it). 3 o’clock, but plenty of time to crank out some quality work.

Home, unload, doggies out to take care of business. Crack my knuckles and take my laptop to my office. I usually write on the screened porch, but the temp is near 100, so upstairs I go. Clearly for the first time in eons, because I can’t even find my desk. Boxes of books had arrived. My mulit-function printer had died; its carcass plopped in the middle of the floor when its replacement arrived. Schedules for book tours had been scattered about; advanced reading copies of books requesting endorsements piled on top. Bills to be paid (uh-oh, look at those due dates!), bank statements, a million scribbled research notes for my current WIP I’d planned on organizing—oh my, there are also quite a few from WHISTLING PAST THE GRAVEYARD that was released in July. Lookie here, a royalty check for an essay I’d contributed to a book on writing—I could get an ice cream with that one.

Well, I’m all for having everything at my fingertips, but there is no way I can work in this mess. Sort. Stack. Shred. Recycle. File.

Nearly 5 o’clock. No problem, hubby won’t be home from work until late this evening. Three-and-a-half uninterrupted hours of writing!

Oh yeah, I need to scan a document and send the pdf to my sister. How did I do that? Remember it’s a new machine. Whew! Done.

Now to work.

The phone rings. Caller ID says it’s one of my kids…the one with the grandbaby. They’re feeling sorry for me all alone at dinner time. Did I want to eat with them? Remember, they have the grandbaby. Yes! I’ll still be back in time to get a couple of hours in before hubby arrives home.

Food. Fun. A lap full of applesauce. Back home.

Look at that tree we planted this year! It looks about to die (we’re having a drought and I don’t have an irrigation system.) I drag out the hose and put it on to drip water the poor thing.

Now!

Dogs need fed.

Done.

Finally sit down at my desk at 7:20 p.m. Tick-tock.

You know what? Today would make a great blog, one that all procrastinators can identify with.

8:15 p.m. Blog finished and I feel less irritated at myself because I turned an unproductive day into something worthwhile.

Now, let’s open that file for the proposal that is due in two weeks.

Oh, dear. Did I just hear the garage door go up?

Well, tomorrow I’ll have the whole day to write. I’m not even going to get dressed or shower so I won’t be tempted to leave the house.

But then…?